I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
He came to the party late, didn't bring tacos, and then asked what shennanigans we were getting into. I swear I will never fuck another hipster.
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
I had not one but two drunk coworkers text me and hit on me tonight. I feel like I've finally been accepted into my dysfunctional workplace
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
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