Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
I had to sleep with my math professor to pass algebra. Apparently my blowjobs are only C+ quality
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
I’m appalled by how severely I lower my standards when I’m horny & impaired
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