Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
I want you to tape your fingers together and give me a lobster claw hand job.
Fuck. I just got my nipple tweaked by a plus size drag queen in a purple dress. I feel like I got molested by Grimace.
I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
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