Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
I looked at you and you stared at me dead in the eyes then sprayed febreze at your crotch and winked.
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
These freshman guys were trying to holler at me from their window, and I realized about 20 minutes too late that the best possible reaction at that time would've been screaming "FLACCID PENIS". Oh, and I found this awesome zombie charm bracelet you would love.
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
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