hotel room ftw
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
Randomize
