Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
my mom asked me how i could steal on a clear conscious and i told her it was because when i was younger she let me watch alladin and he did it.
Dude, I woke up in the kitchen, naked, with a blueberry bagel as a pillow.
Can I eat your pillow?
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
I caved man... I fucked her so vigorously, desperately trying to correct her wonky eye. My determination was relentless.
You are a terrible person.
I just try to be optimistic...
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
I think the fact that I stole someone's mail and broke my big toe means that I should consider taking some time away from vodka
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
Randomize
