I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
woke up this morning with pubes superglued to my face, not my pubes
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
You threw an open can of pop at me while I was lying on the floor babbling and drooling about how I need to be alone forever, me and my leaking face.
I knew things were bad when I walked in on you feeding juice to your iPhone
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
I need a beard to bite.
Randomize