New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
Randomize
