U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
I just remembered our "im drunk enough to look at your vagina" conversation. Is that offer still valid? I really think I need a second opinion
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
We can only continue to use the "oh what's the difference between circumcised and uncircumcised" for a few more months before people will see through our lies
You realized your blanket was a snuggie, spread your arms, and yelled "tonight I sleep like jesus!"
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
Randomize
