dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
My concierge just asked me to his place for dinner while I was signing for a delivery. The delivery was a box of vibrators. Let's discuss.
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
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