just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
i now understand why vodka
Just so you know, you called at 2 last night and kept making me tell you that I loved you and then when you got home you thanked me for walking you home. Incase you forgot, I'm still about 200 miles away.
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
Randomize
