I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
He passed out mid-signature
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
I'm offering you baseball tickets and my vagina, isn't that enough?
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
I made it to work. Still drunk. Definitely pregnant.
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
Randomize
