I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
Randomize
