Just figured out how to smoke weed with a toaster.
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
Randomize