I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
did not feel like going to store to get condoms last night so went to her pantry and got a sandwich bag and a rubberband
did it work?
nope
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
Randomize
