Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
finding my wedding ring encrusted in vomit this morning really just topped off last night...
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
Can't talk, ducks in the car
If there's one thing I think I could really excel it, it's curating a midlife crisis
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
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