this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
She was purple for Halloween. She literally spray-painted herself purple and called it a costume. It won't come off.
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass
Why is there bacon in the couch?
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
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