i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
She made me walk a straight line to prove i was sober enough to help carry you to the car
Knowing you it was perfect out of spite. Like. A line straighter than YOU
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Randomize
