on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
I have one of those hangovers where you visualize how awesome it would be to climb in your fridge and drink glacier water
That's always how I imagine things at your apartment...
Good, I'm glad you don't have some weird, skewed, clothed version of reality over here.
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
Celebrated Veteran's Day by getting a Marine (who just got back from deployment in the middle east) drunk and laid for the first time in 6 months. #Murica
the fact that I can still put my shoes on is a testament to the fact that I can outdrink these bros
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
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