thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
It's always a surprise to see what songs I shazamed and downloaded last night while we were drunk at the bar.
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
Don't know why you're always hating on relationships. I've had chocolate pancakes accompanied by a blowjob and a blunt and it's not even 9 am. Time for mid morning shower sex. Enjoy your morning bong bowl alone asshole
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
The 666th photo in my phone is of him and if that's not a sign that he's secretly the Antichrist, idk what is. Also, bring more rum.
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
Randomize
