Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
New high or new low? Cat walked into the bathroom while I was taking a #2, looked @ me, sneezed and walked out..
Why are we friends again?
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
I woke up under the stretchy sheet like the corners were still stuck under the bed. I had to wiggle the corners off in order to get up. I was trapped. how did that happen
Randomize
