nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
I just had a contest with the toilet to see who could hold their breath longest.
I won
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
Trying to put a fitted sheet on drunk is one of the boss levels of slutty adulthood.
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
I don’t care how cute or big a guy is I’m done with drunken hand jobs. It was like I was pulling a nine inch bungee cord for 25 minutes. Now My arm and shoulder is dead
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