Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
my boss said she was surprised to see me this morning. i told her there's a time in a girls life she has to give up day drinking in order to make money for next weekend's alcohol. she looked so proud, i think i might get a raise.
He scratched off my spray tan. Literal nail marks down my back. Can't imagine what's underneath his fingernails.
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
I think people are normalizing furries
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
I just timed my pee with a stop watch. From when the main stream started to ended. It was 45.1 seconds. This is the truth trust me.
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
Randomize
