What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
The guy I brought home last night made a speedy escape while I was in the bathroom. The only trace I found of his flight was a lone sock on the stairs.... It was like a whorey low budget Cinderella
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
My goal for the weekend: procure a blowjob using only stern glances, hand gestures, and crudely-drawn stick figures.
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
I was giving this fat lawyer a table dance and he asked me if I would be willing to play with his long, hard stick of the law. And you want me to stop drinking at work?
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
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