that's an acceptable place to lick
Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
#1- I went to button my shirt only to find they were all mising. #2- I'm so fu@king sore I feel like I was sweating to the oldies all night. #3- this pounding headache I have, I blame solely on Jennifer. Everyone sounds like Billy Mays when they talk. I remember nothing from last night, I'm concerned.
I stared at his lazy eye for so long, he thought I had one too. Then we bonded over our lazy eyes. I had to fake one all night. My head is fucking killing me. NEVER pretend to have a lazy eye.
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
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