I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
Grilled cheese is the best thing. ever. better than boys, and alcohol, and sex, and chocolate, and money. But not really the last two.
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
My dad just called from upstairs on the house phone to tell me to bring him a beer. You tell me how I am.
i woke up and the dog was eating spaghetti off my chest.
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
It was only funny because some guy across the street was getting his mail and he just stopped and watched me throw up everywhere
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
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