I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
Quick, to the slutcave!
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
He explained how that handle got into our fridge. I think i'm going to stick with my original assumption that the vodka gods want me to drink more vodka.
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
Randomize
