If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
How drunk are you?
Completed.
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
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