I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
They were playing some sort of fast food scavenger hunt game as an ice breaker. Some chick stamped a Starbucks logo on my hand and told me to go find the girl with the matching stamp and fill her with cream.
Dave had an Arby’s stamp and some sorority girl grabbed him and screamed “I’ve have the meat!”\n
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