remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
You do realize I got a panda tattooed on my ass just to get you laid, right?
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
I had a dream where I was about to fight you but you were dressed like a greek god and had just killed a werewolf with your bare hands
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
The EMT told me when I left the ER "I'd like to take off your pants again and inspect your package. Just not during a medical emergency..." We're hooking up tonight.
Points for getting a hot hook up after getting a shard of glass in your thigh. Almost makes it worth it.
My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
Randomize
