i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
I need you to perform a face transplant. Please remove your face from your accounting book and relocate it to where it's most needed - between my legs.
Hey before you quit, let me sell drugs to your boss at least one more time
I felt like I should've driven him home but I was holding in a fart and just needed him to leave
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
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