Haha, just learned changing others iPhone passcodes is fun while drunk but not fun the next morning.
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
i woke up with my wallet keys and phone missing and a treasure map to find them stapled to my shirt.
haha i know
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
Randomize