After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
My parole officer gave me condoms and a Starbucks gift card ... happy holidays.
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
Yeah.. I'm sorry I broke your phone. But in my defense you handed me the frying pan.
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
Welp. It's confirmed. There is literally no lube on this entire island. Fuck me. More accurately, don't fuck me.
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
Don't care if they even pay me; I lifeguard for the fringe benefits -- free tourist vagina in the Hilton jacuzzi every single night
Randomize
