I just met lou reed's venus in furs. Her hands are slippery.
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
A stoners worse nightmare? Well packaged snacks. Just took me 5 mins to get a cinnamon roll out of the package. And another 3 mins to properly type this text
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
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