shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
at the hospital. he locked himself in the kitchen, said he was making beer batter shrimp. don't know if it's the mercury poisoning, alcohol poisoning or second degree burns they're holding him for, but i've got a pretty guess.
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
'Well you know, stuff happens' isn't really an excuse for sticking a cheeto in my ear
I just soaked a sugar cookie in nail polish remover to clean off my nails because I was too lazy to walk to the bathroom to get a cotton ball. Is this what rock bottom feels like?
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
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