Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
Mike and I just ate the lobster we found in the toilet
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
My concierge just asked me to his place for dinner while I was signing for a delivery. The delivery was a box of vibrators. Let's discuss.
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
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