girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
My horoscope told me I'm getting laid tonight. Please don't make the stars be liars
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
Randomize
