I wish I had a dollar for every time I've slept off a late night I dont want to remember in my recliner.
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
So, I'm drinking, and I put my head down in the table. The cat jumped up to check on me, I have a cat sober monitor.
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
Randomize
