Being pregnant is so damn inconvenient for my sex life.
I spent my night drunkenly staring at a picture of John Stamos. How do you think I feel?
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
My hair is short now so it will be easier to give you alot more blow jobs
I'm going to take this text and frame it on my mantle
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
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