I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
Hey, I told her the bathroom was a "No fly zone" after I used it. She willingly allowed her nose to go through that pain. It's her fault, she only supplied me with vodka when she knows I only drink rum.
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
Randomize
