this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
Well THAT'S the last time I buy beer and baby wipes in the same Walmart run ... just wanted to shout I USE THEM TO REMOVE MY MAKEUP, YOU ASSHOLES
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
Randomize
