she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
Im gonna name my vag after egypt, "the valley of kings"
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
He just brought me a wine glass. Full of Tequila. Ignore any texts after this one.
She calls me Shortcake and bites my ear. Trust me, I'm FINE with bein the secret lesbian lover.
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
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