So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
My concierge just asked me to his place for dinner while I was signing for a delivery. The delivery was a box of vibrators. Let's discuss.
Dude, I passed out on the side walk, lost my phone and shirt, and walked 12 miles home after I disappeared from the club
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
Randomize
