if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
before tonight, i was terrified of what tequila would make me do. but all it did was make me hook up with a movie star. sooo basically tequila's my new fave
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
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