I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
I've been up for almost three hours and it took me until JUST NOW to figure out that what I'm tasting isn't blood, just the minerals in the water. Fuck hangovers, man.
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Randomize
