East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
Boys can't fool me. I know "want to come up and meet my dogs?" is just a nondirect way of saying "come up and meet my penis".
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
It's like "hey I give your roommate blowjobs twice a week, want to connect on LinkedIn?"
I lost the right to judge tonight
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
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