Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
Watching porn with a bag of marshmallows. Thats when you know you're stoned.
Are you awake? Because I would like to know whether or not I should refrain from giving my evil laugh when I enter the apartment...
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
I made a bucket list last night. Number 5: Will marry a wizard.
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
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