i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
One of my students just told me turtles are lazy and need to get a job. Fuck yes, my job here is done.
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
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