I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
Woke up this morning with a junior police officer sticker over my nipple this morning.
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
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