no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
I literally just biked home like I was on the last leg about to win the tour du France. Fuck diarrhea
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
I sent him a tex saying, "I thought my intentions were clear" drunk me has some balls.
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